On March 15th 2011, I found out that we were pregnant. My cycles were slightly longer than the average woman's, however they weren't classified as irregular, as I could predict when my period was due. Our son was conceived naturally, and on November 12th 2011, he made his way into the world. John Malik Damian Price was born twelve days early, weighing 8lbs 09oz, and was 21.5 inches. He was the perfect child. He only cried to be fed, and that was it. John was looked exactly like a Gerber baby. Zak and I may have been poor, but with him in our lives, we were rich. I stayed at home to care for him while Zak worked part time as a waiter. Later on, he continued to work part time, but also became a full time student at Virginia Tech.
When John was only five months old, April 2012, I started getting "Baby Fever" again. Zak didn't want us to get pregnant again so soon, but after talking about it for a while, we decided that we would try to have the children eighteen months apart. I started charting my cycles again, to see if I was ovulating and such. I found that my luteal phase was under two weeks long, so I took my concerns to the doctor. I was told that I had LPD (Luteal Phase Disorder), and that I could get pregnant, but I would miscarry without ever knowing, as the zygote wouldn't have time to implant before my next cycle would start. The next cycle, I went from June to September without any period. Though we had initially agreed to start trying to get pregnant in August, we were more concerned with my negative pregnancy tests and my period coming so late. We stopped using protection, but we weren't actively trying yet.
After another two months without a period, I started to really become concerned with my cycles. In October 2012, we decided to really start trying to get pregnant. On John's first birthday however, I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). My world was shattered. How could I have PCOS after naturally conceiving my son? As each month passed afterwards, I never knew when I was going to be ovulating, nor did I know when my period was ever due. Sex became a mandatory act in order to have a chance in getting pregnant. To save our marriage, we decided that we could not force each other to keep having sex, when neither of us knew if it was doing any good.
Finally, after eleven months of trying to get pregnant, I gave up hope. Even though we usually had sex at all the right times (though we could not detect when ovulation would occur, we could confirm ovulation after it had already happened by taking my temperature daily), I never got pregnant. This leads me to yesterday; I got my period and called my doctor. I am officially starting Clomid, a drug to stimulate my ovaries to release eggs earlier in my cycle. There is a risk for twins, or even triplets, but it's better than not having anymore children.
This is a journal, a diary, a part of my heart that I am letting the world see. This is the tale of how I started fertility treatments, my family life, and everything in between. As I write this, I do not know how this story will end. Perhaps it will end bitter-sweet, never having anymore children, but showering my son with all the love and affection he could ever want. Or maybe I find out after months of trying that I'm not expecting one, nor two, or three babies, but FOUR! There are chances in this tale for miscarriages, stillbirths, heartaches, and sorrows, but there is also a glimmer of hope that it'll bring love, life, and an end to loneliness.
This is my story.
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| Zak, Donna, & John Price November 2012 |
